Sign Of Fake Friends And How To Find Real Friends

I Deeply value the small circle of women in my life who are my closest real friends, and I make a concerted effort to be authentic and not a fake friend to them.

Developing this amazing circle of friendships and becoming the kind of friend myself that I would like to have in others has taken a lot of time and energy.

It has taken years to realize exactly what I need in a friendship, how I want to relate to my friends, and how I want to feel when I’m around them.

In the past, I was not as mindful or intentional about my friendships. I focused more on trying to make myself fit into the friendship rather than finding friends who were a good match for me. I spent more effort than was reasonable trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. I now see more clearly how to spot a fake friend.

If you have struggled with fake friends, here are some things you need to know.

If you are highly sensitive or a people pleaser, you might be vulnerable to the kind of friend who takes advantage of you or manipulates you.

1. They tend to disappear when you need their friendship most.

2. They frequently gossip about other friends to you (so they likely gossip about you as well).

3. They try to make you feel guilty or when things don’t go their way.

4. They have a hard time being happy for your successes and achievements.

5. They are disinterested in getting to know you on a deeper level.

6. They put you down for your opinions or beliefs.

7. They judge your flaws and mistakes harshly.

8. They rarely initiate get-togethers or calls to connect.

9. They always turn the conversation back to themselfs.

10. They never stand up for you in front of others.

11. They frequently break promises or “forget” commitments.

12. They have a heightened sense of self-importance and entitlement.

13. They use back-handed compliments to confuse and wound you.

14. They hold your past mistakes over you and won’t let them go.

15. They infect you and everyone else with their bad mood or ill temper.

16. They forget the important things going on in your life.

17 They make an excuse when you need help.

18 They remember you when they need you .

19 They can easily drop you as a friend when it suits them.


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Ways to make your own sunshine !!

It don’t matter if it’s raining 
Nothing can phase me 
I make my own sunshine 
And if you think you can break me 
Baby you’re crazy 
I make my own sunshine

–Alyssa Bonagura,  “I Make My Own Sunshine”

Here are few ways to make your own sunshine.

1)  Get up and move around or go out for a walk. Take the fresh air , look at the green leaves and the beautiful melody of the birds.

2)  Reach out to friends.  If they’re busy right now, email them or leave them a message on your social platform. Trust me it is a greatest therapy.

3)  Cross an item off your “to-do” list.  If you can, use the “one-minute rule”: don’t put anything off for longer than one minute.  It will save your time to do much activity in your 24 hr day.

4) Lay the groundwork for something fun in the near future.  Order a book, plan a getaway.  Visit any nearby church or temple function to attend.  Plan with your friends for a movie theater.  Find out what’s going on in your area.  Find out what’s being featured at a local museum or what concerts are coming up at local schools or in your community.  It’s important to get out of town every once in a while, or at least to get out of the house.

5)  Do a good deed each day, just for love, with no strings attached and no expectation of reward.  In fact,do something for your inner soul or happiness without anybody seeing you or telling to anyone.

6)  Act happy; smile; It creates a positive vibes around you. Try to make people happy around too.

7)  Listen to your favorite music, or watch a comedy or adventure video.  You can make some fashion tutorial or any video to YouTube online. 

8)  Keep a Gratitude Notebook and list the things you are grateful for today.  Date your entry.  Keep putting entries in the notebook whenever you think of it.  

9)  Consciously lower the bar for making yourself happy.  Instead of vowing that you won’t be happy until you get everything in your life.  Some people are happy to know that they are still alive and kicking at the start of each new day.

10)  Realize that happiness is something you create while you are on the journey, not something you can only have when you have reached your destination.

11) Forgive yourself and forgive others.  There’s no sense in allowing old grudges or memories of past failures to make you miserable.

12)  Learn to meditate and write yourself some affirmations.  Keep affirmations in the present tense, and keep them short.  Post them on your bathroom mirror and say them aloud, with feeling, as you look at yourself in the mirror.   Or re-read them to yourself just before you go to sleep each night. 

13)  Make sure you have something on your personal calendar every day, even if it is only running an errand.

14)  Focus on others rather than on yourself. 

15)  List your achievements and be sure to pat yourself on the back for each one.

16)  Develop a hobby, or if you already have one, develop another one.

17)  Set some short-term and long-term goals, and be sure to cross them off your list when you have accomplished each one.  The Japanese have a great way to do this.  They have little round dolls called daruma that come with the eyes blank.  When you make a wish or set a goal, you paint in  one eye, as in the illustration at left.  When your goal is complete, you paint in the other eye.  You can find a picture of a daruma by going to Google and typing in that word.  Choose an image with blank eyes.  Print it out and use black marker to fill in one eye.  Write your goal down on that same piece of paper. Then put the paper in a safe place and don’t forget to fill in the other eye when your wish comes true or your goal has been met.   Whenever you do meet a goal, celebrate – with others, if possible.

18)  Find ways to keep your immediate surroundings calm.  This is as simple as cleaning off your desk, sorting your papers, throwing away junk, or putting things away where they belong.  For a more long-term solution, you may wish to consider painting a room that you use most often a “happier”  shade, or find some artwork that pleases you and hang it in a prominent place in your home.

19) Distance yourself from negative people.  You don’t have to allow negative people into your space.  If you are forced to work with negative people, learn how to surround yourself with a bubble of light while you’re at work.

20)  Stop thinking about and talking about your problems.  Remember that life unfolds around you based on what you are focusing on.  If you are focusing on your problems, you will end up making yourself needlessly miserable.

🙂

Please put your thoughts in the comment section below. I wish you all a happy Christmas and Great weekend ahead

Quote !!

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Life is an amazing gift . Our lives are nothing but a cosmic blink. Even our seemingly all-encompassing world is just tiny blue dot circling an average sized star spiraling around a galaxy of 200-400 billion stars, which itself is just one galaxy among billions more. Yet for one brief moment, we get to experience the wonders of existence, of consciousness.

Our brains are wired to find things we’re looking for – if you’re always cynical or waiting for things to go wrong, then your life will reflect that. On the other hand, having a positive outlook on life will bring you joy and provide you with inspiration when you least expect it.

Of course, there are times when it’s difficult to feel cheery or positive – life can be difficult. If you’re having trouble seeing the cup as half full instead of half empty, reading some positive quotes about life can help you snap out of your funk. Here are some inspirational life quotes to help you see the amazing potential that life has to offer.

“Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.”– Dennis P. Kimbro

“There is no royal road to anything. One thing at a time, all things in succession. That which grows fast, withers as rapidly. That which grows slowly, endures.”– Josiah Gilbert Holland

“Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.”– William James

“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me.”– Erma Bombeck

“The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.”– Will Rogers

“Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.”– Will Rogers

“When I hear somebody sigh, ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’”– Sydney Harris

“Nurture your mind with great thoughts. To believe in the heroic makes heroes.”– Benjamin Disraeli
“The real opportunity for success lies within the person and not in the job.”– Zig Ziglar
“Look at the sparrows; they do not know what they will do in the next moment. Let us literally live from moment to moment.”– Mahatma Gandhi
“Luck is a dividend of sweat. The more you sweat, the luckier you get.”– Ray Kroc
“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”– Lao Tzu
“You may find the worst enemy or best friend in yourself.”– English Proverb
“Whoever loves much, performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well.”– Vincent Van Gogh
“Courage is the first of human qualities because it is the quality which guarantees all others.”– Winston Churchill
“The great thing in this world is not so much where you stand, as in what direction you are moving.”– Oliver Wendell Holmes
“Live each day as if your life had just begun.”– Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
“Every truth passes through three stages before it is recognized. In the first, it is ridiculed. In the second, it is opposed. In the third, it is regarded as self evident.”– Arthur Schopenhauer
“Either you run the day, or the day runs you.”– Jim Rohn
“The difference between a successful person and others is not lack of strength not a lack of knowledge but rather a lack of will.”– Vince Lombardi
“If not us, who? If not now, when?”– John F. Kennedy
“Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.”– Jack Canfield
“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.”– Carl Bard
“Some men see things as they are and say why – I dream things that never were and say why not.”– George Bernard Shaw
“The only way of finding the limits of the possible is by going beyond them into the impossible.”– Arthur C. Clarke
“Speak less than you know; have more than you show.”– William Shakespeare
“Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”– Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Many of life’s failures are experienced by people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”– Thomas Edison
“Rule #1 of life. Do what makes YOU happy.”- Me

Stop These 6 Things to Become the Best Version of Yourself !

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1. Stop the fear of failure

Overcome your fears by analyzing all potential outcomes, practice positive thinking have a worst-case scenario to ease your worries, and practice setting goals.

Remember: “Fear will do one thing and one thing only: hold you back.” 

2. Stop the fear of success

People are afraid of success for a myriad of reasons, such as fear of losing their identity, more responsibility being added, raised expectations, and not being able to handle success well.

Success is a good thing, everyone deserves to live out his or her dreams and have a positive impact on the world. Handle success by staying authentic and remembering who you are, accept you won’t please everyone, and be comfortable with every decision you make.

3. Stop people pleasing

People pleaser are taken advantage of, prone to stress and depression, develop resentment over time toward people in their lives, and are prone to health issues, such as weight gain. Once you quit people pleasing, you’ll regain your sense of who you are and build up confidence.

Live your life to please yourself and to heck with everyone else.

4. Stop criticizing and judging others

To become the best version of yourself, you need to eliminate all negative energy. When you throw negative energy at people, you’re potentially damaging a person’s self-worth and self-esteem. You’re also throwing buckets of negative energy out into the universe yourself.

Avoid criticizing and judging others by not assuming anything; know it’s not about you, and pretend to walk in their shoes to see the situation from their perspective.

5. Stop procrastination

To stop procrastinating, make you actions precise and calculated, have some form of accountability established, and set your goals up in a way in which they are small, manageable, and easily achievable.

6. Stop the negative self-talk

Silencing the inner critic and putting a positive spin on things are two of the best ways to eliminate negative self-talk. Start by eliminating negative vocabulary, such as always, can’t, never (and ever), won’t, but, should, and try.

As it would say, “Do or do not. There is no try.

you-never-know-how-storng-you-are-until-being-strong-is-the-only-choice-you-have-665x435

Comment below on some other ways you feel people stop themselves from becoming the best version of themselves? I’ll love to hear your responses

Harsh Truth of life !!

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Read it out some of the harsh truth of life until it happens to make a best version of yourself .  I  think it gonna head it in right direction and make progress to your life .  These are the bitter truth of the life but you have to accept it .

You Are Going to Lose Everything Eventually

Everything you have is borrowed, and there is going to be a time you’ll have to give it all back. Your money, clothes and property won’t stay with you forever. Friends and family members pass on and some grow apart from you. Even existence itself is time-limited.

I’m guessing some readers feel this is a needlessly depressing topic. Focusing on death and the impermanence of everything is scary for many people. I don’t see it that way. In fact, the sheer impermanence in life is actually freeing. If you can fully accept it, you are free to enjoy this existence focusing on what really matters, instead of worrying about all the crap that isn’t important.

life isn’t fair

Things always not go in our way or the way we want it would be .What imporatant is to keep a positive mind and deal with it .

People aren’t going to be always nice to you .

Some times no matter how nice you are but some people will be always rude or in attitude with you . You can stand up for yourself and still care about what someone has to say. Human beings are dynamic like that.It’s not in anyone’s best interest if you go out of your way to be nice. In fact, being nice can be detrimental to you and those around you in a number of ways.

No one is perfect .

No one is perfect.  So everyone has strengths and weaknesses. Some of us are creative. We see the big picture, but not the details. Others are detail oriented to the point they miss seeing the forest, but take in each and every tree.

Perfection is only an ideal, not a reality. Life keeps EVOLVING…with no end. Perfection implies and END.

Change always happens.

Always remember
Life is what you make it ! Don’t underestimate when you are knocked down, rising above all odds is the only solution to this.

You never get your wasted time back

If you love life,don’t waste time,for time is what life is made up of.Lost time can never be bought back.Time once wasted will never forgive you for not utilizing it .Just as they say” Time and Tide waits for none.”We never know if the opportunities we have today , will still be there later.Life is very uncertain and if you fail to live every moment like its your last, you might have to regret later

Happiness is what you do for others

There is a Chinese saying that goes: “If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody.” For centuries, the greatest thinkers have suggested the same thing: Happiness is found in helping others.

You like being alone but you are not a loner.

“If you’re lonely when you’re alone, you’re in bad company.” – Jean-Paul Sartre

It is impossible to exist without social contact. You can be as strong and self-sufficient as you like, but at the end of the day you need to interact in a real, personal and meaningful way, which is neither Facebook nor Twitter. You need to be in contact with real people for this.At the same time, you can enjoy quiet time alone and be comfortable.

 Money is tight

Nobody wants to be stalked by debt or creditors. You have to work out how best to stay within your budget. Think of ways to save, like having packed lunches. Never go shopping without a list. Avoid impulsive buys. Use cash as much as you can. Leave the credit cards at home as they tend to lull you into a fantasy world.

Lower your expectations

Don’t think that people will always be there when you fall or fail. The phone will go silent. Many friends will suddenly be very busy with their own problems. When I was recovering from a fall, not one person in my condo offered to help me with carrying the shopping!

Your dreams come true only when YOU make them come true.

 And that’s precisely what makes them worth having and working hard for.

If achievement had no price, it would be of no value.

 Pay the price.  Do the work, and enjoy the rewards.  It is far better to be exhausted from meaningful work than to be tired of doing nothing.  Put in the effort and live the life you’ve imagined

So what do you think?  For me, above all, these points remind me that living a rewarding life isn’t easy, and it certainly isn’t guaranteed, but it’s possible with the right attitude and drive, and worth every bit of effort you can muster.

So with this theme in mind, here are a few harsh truths that I hope will jolt you awake and motivate you to make changes – to do what it takes – to live your version of a great life: Post your views in the comment section !!!!

My life !!

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My life is full of poetry
in lyrical  way of design
Expressions in a rhythm
that ascend and then decline.

One moment I am full of joy,
then sorrow breaks my heart.
My soul is touched by music
and the thrill that it imparts.

I love the rain, embrace the sun
and smile at winter snow.
I crave the full moon’s silver light
and dance beneath the glow.
IMG_9493
I savor sweet aromas
taking pleasure in the breeze
And love the gentle rustle,
as it passes through the trees.

Yes, poetic is the gift of life,
inspiring me to rhyme.
I’d write a million odes to it,
but I just don’t have another life !

Hey folks follow me on Instagram And Facebook :

https://www.instagram.com/preetynisha121/

https://www.facebook.com/preety.nisha.3

 

Liebster Award !!!

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Thank you so much to https://mysliceofmexico.ca/ for the nomination to the Liebster Award. Her blog always has something extraordinary, from MEXICO’S CUISINE, CULTURE AND HISTORY THROUGH THE RECIPES, BACKYARD STORIES !

I understand that this award is meant as an instrument to encourage and mentor new bloggers. From The Global Aussie: “The earliest case of the award goes as far back as 2011.  Liebster in German means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing, and welcome.”  The award initially focused on bloggers with less than 2000 followers, but as its popularity burgeoned, I am really grateful that she nominated me and please do visit her blog !!

The rules of the Liebster Award, as received from https://mysliceofmexico.ca/ :

1. Acknowledge the blogger that gave it to you and display the award.
2. Answer 11 questions that the blogger gives you.
3. Give 11 random thoughts about yourself.
4. Nominate 11 blogs and notify them of their nomination.
5. Give these blogs 11 questions to answer

11 Questions from https://mysliceofmexico.ca/, and my answers:
What is your biggest pet peeve?
When people break your trust .
Where did you get your name?
From my family.
If you could change your name, what would it be?
I think it suits my personality .
What was your favorite TV show as a kid?
As a child i used to see Friends and Disney world .
Do you have any weird habits?
I Don’t think but i feel i sleep much when I  get free time.
Do you like fall scents /tastes?
I love fall’s natural scents and tastes.
What is your favorite holiday and why?
I like places which are peaceful like hilly areas.
Do you prefer writing it down or typing it up?
I prefer to  type now but I love writing .
Netflix or cable?
Netflix
If money didn’t matter, what would you do with your life?
I think money is required for full filling the basic requirements of life .
What is your favorite thing about yourself?
I  am very positive person .

11 random thoughts about myself:
My mind can be easily transcended with regular practice and regulation.
In a car, I prefer to sit in front seat.
I am a sea lover.
I like to get up early without putting an alarm.
I am good at sketching potraits.
I used to play badminton specially in winter season.
I like horror and adventure (books, movies, concepts)
My favourite beauty brand is MAC
I don’t like mobile games.
My favourite day of the week is Wednesday
My favourite subject in school was always Mathematics

I am providing a list of 11 blogs:

https://rachealnovel.wordpress.com/
https://jeevithamlove.wordpress.com/
https://mylifeexperiences648467241.com/
https://avoicefromiran.wordpress.com/
https://sweetnicethings.nl/
https://thepoetic1.com/
https://stellanjayshow.com/
https://nagstrong12.wordpress.com/
https://southtexascomadre.wordpress.com/
https://stephentotheplate.wordpress.com/
https://joysen.world/blog/

My questions for the bloggers, should they freely choose to answer them, are basically my thoughts from above:
Personality: Are you a …
1) Half-full-glass or half-empty-glass person?
2) Driver or passenger?
3) Fish in the water or land lover?
4) Early or late person?
Your Favourite things:
5) Food and beverage(s)
6) Sport(s) (play or watch)
7) Movie genre(s)
8) Fictional character(s)
9) Animal(s)
10) Day of the week
Random:
11) Do you like Math? (hee-hee, get it?)